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[chipped]

WELCOME TO THE SALTBURNT NETWORK

USERNAME:
SPIKE

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Comments

[smudgy]

oh yeah?
what r u waiting for then

🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️

[ get moving!! ]

[chipped]

On my way, little blueberry

🎁 — delivery.

[smudgy]

[ At the crypt that Spike’s taken to calling his own and Jinx has affectionally named “the saddest place in the world”, she has helpfully decorated a blank, dilapidated wall with sprawling graffiti (including the claim, SPIKE’S PLACE, in her jagged scrawl, explosions, skulls, and a fanged version of her usual monkeys, to boot).

And on a card, left on whatever piece of cement he calls a table, she writes: ]

SEE YA AT PROM, FANGS.

[ Accompanied by a drawing of figures that are clearly them, dancing at said prom. Not asking him so much as telling but, hey, it’s affectionate. ]

1/2 📲 text

[chipped]

[ A day-ish later, a photo of a big, overstuffed blue armchair in front of the graffiti wall, definitely stolen from some posh sitting room or other. ]

Got you a chair to go with your mural. For when you want to come watch telly with me

✉️ text — un: astarion.

[thirsted]

And how does one get from "William" to "Spike," exactly?

[chipped]

You sure it's me you want to take to the big dance, pet? Daddy won't give us an 8 PM curfew?

[chipped]

Don't tell me you've never fancied a little image change in your hundred-plus years on earth

1/2

[smudgy]

[ re: the chair — ]

🩵📺👾💥

[smudgy]

don’t get all shy on me now
u reaaaaally think i don’t know what i want
and do what i want
whenever i want it

[chipped]

Yeah, fair enough

If the dance gets boring I reckon we can make our own fun

✉️ text — @waterdeep.

[corporeity]

Most likely to break hearts! What a superlative. I have to assume there’s a story behind it, my friend.

[chipped]

What can I say? I've always been bad

Tough break on coolest powers, though

[corporeity]

Ah, well, it was an honour to be nominated, as a man past his prime. You know as well as I that my powers have soured, so to speak.

[ having tasted the rot in his veins. ]

Is it not a lonely role to play? The rake so oft exits the stage before we know him well at all.

[thirsted]

That's what it is? An image change?

[chipped]

What's the point of becoming undead if you can't shake things up a little?

Had the nickname half-picked for me already, though. Got to be "William the Bloody," first.

[thirsted]

I suppose I'd be picking low-hanging fruit to say that's hardly imaginative.

At any rate, I've met more than a few undead who didn't have a choice in the matter. I don't believe "shaking things up" even entered into the picture.

[smudgy]

uh oh
u haven’t been to the club yet huh
there’s always a twist, spikey
oughta worry about it being too much fun 🤭

1/2

[chipped]

But you can still do a neat trick or three, yeah? Despite the lemon blood.

[chipped]

You want a taste of the rake, mate? Bet your boyfriend wouldn't like that.

[chipped]

Yeah? Last prom I heard about, the mayor turned into a giant snake and ate the school principal. We talking that kind of fun, or the other kind?

[ Because there are just two, obviously. ]

[chipped]

Spike's more fun than William the Bloody, ain't it. And less of a mouthful.

You talking about yourself, stud? Or are the other few undead in the room with us now?

[thirsted]

I couldn't possibly say.

Half-picked, then, hm? By whom?

1/2

[corporeity]

A flattering entreaty, but you’ll find I’m quite content with the love of my life.

[ u can’t embarrass a SIMP. ]

[corporeity]

To answer your sincere question, however, yes, I remain an exceptional wizard. The talent and ego of a generation, as my professor so frankly put it.

And, I should add, a mage uniquely well—equipped to assist you with the request you put to the network not so long ago.

[smudgy]

whoooooa
wish i was there
mostly they give u stuff that makes u horny
but i heard some people came
back from the dead one time